House Of Whacked

Fortunately not everything revolves around politics in life. Sometimes it's just fun to enjoy a good "popcorn movie". This Friday a third version of the 1933 The Mystery Of The Wax Museum hits theatres.

In the original, Lionel Atwill plays a wax museum sculptor in London. But after a fire destroys his museum and leaves him disabled, he reopens in New York and restocks his museum with murder victims placed under wax. Reporter Fay Wray is suspicious of weird goings on here, and investigates. A very good early horror and weird crime popcorn movie.

In 1953, horror legend Vincent Price brought an excellent 3D new version to theatres. The story line was very similar and an improved retelling of the original classic. In 3D this movie may be the best due to a few campy 3D effects solely for the viewer, but even without this effect, the story holds up with a creepy lurking black clothed phantom who lurks through the night and the seemingly kindly Vincent Price sculptor confined to a wheelchair after a business partner arsons the museum for insurance money. A creepy soundtrack follows the lurking phantom, and the whole story hits a creepy head at the end. And a young Charles Bronson plays a strange deaf-mute sidekick. A very good popcorn horror classic.

Now comes a 2005 retelling. And I do mean retelling. Compared to the 1953 House Of Wax , at least the storyline seems totally "House Of Whacked". How do you replace horror legend Vincent Price with Paris Hilton who is merely a legend for acting horrible in nightvision porn and other outlandish activities. Well, if you've seen recent horror films for young audiences like Scream or such you get the idea where this film is headed.

Young stars like Paris Hilton and Elisha Cuthbert from TV's 24 an The Girl Next Door, help build a young cast who visit a deserted town and face trouble in a wax museum. This doesn't compare to the historic settings of the two original films. This is unfortunately due to the fact that historic setting films don't fare well at the box office because many young people avoid historic based films like the plague. So you have a story nothing like the two classics , but solely designed to draw in young viewers for a week or two, make lots of money and then go to DVD and make even more money. Purists who love the classic story line will be disappointed at these changes. But young people who have seen neither the 1933 or 1953 classics probably will feel very satisfied at an acceptable popcorn movie for their generation's tastes.

Maybe someday a great filmmaker like a Stephen Spielberg will make a faithful retelling of this classic creepy crime and horror story. But for now this is the type of retelling that will sell to young moviegoers.